The Ready Vessel

"Life requires countless 'little' deaths-- occasions where we are given the chance to say no to self and yes to God."
-Elisabeth Elliot

I was feeling a little discouraged at Bible study the other night, not because of where I am with the Lord right now, but it just seemed to unfair that things had to end like this. No lesson learned is wasted time, but sometimes it does feel like that when so many regrets and disappointments took place. Can't lessons ever be a little less messy? Teri slid this verse over to me, as a 'private text,' and it really helped a lot:

"I will repay you for the years the locust has eaten-- the great locust and the young locust, the great army that I sent among you."
-Joel 2:25

The Lord restores! He is faithful, and can turn the broken into the redeemed. I do believe that He loves me passionately. He is jealous for me! I am so undeserving of His great love and mercy, and all I want to do is stand in awe, bow in front of Him and beg just to kiss His feet. He is beautiful.

I sit with Him, and just cry tears of shame and ask how He can possibly love a sinner like me, yet He has already demonstrated that love before I even existed. But He knew. He died for me. Why should I not die for Him?

La Nieve!

Last day!

Fearing for my sanity, I braved the cold this morning in the 10 degree weather (negative 10 degree wind chill!) and drove my little car to school. What normally is a five minute drive took me just about twenty minutes to finally arrive at Washburn, and no spots were available in the circle parking lot (que una sorpresa!). I parked near Stoffer and walked my little self over to Morgan, wearing my seven layers of clothing, covering the side of my face that my hood didn't reach to avoid the snowy gust of wind. I know, I am painting the most dramatic picture of my morning, but it was really cold! North Pole here!

I took my last and only final in about forty-five minutes, and stuck around the outside of Miguel's office talking with a fellow classmate, Alcira. She's a mom, taking classes full-time and working as a para (? how in the world do you spell that word? That looks wrong! Or maybe I'm just thinking in Spanish right now) at Williams. She's from Venezuela, so she is totally hating the weather right now. :) Anyway, we ended up chatting for about twenty minutes and we exchanged phone numbers so that we can get together over the break to practice language (her English, and my Spanish). I'm really excited about this! Since I'm not taking any Spanish classes next semester, I was worried that I would lose some of my comprehension and ability to speak at least somewhat coherently, but now with the help of a few Spanish-speaking friends, who needs the classroom?

I have my computer, notebooks and books here to keep me company at the library until I finally finish my research paper for Art of Africa and last-minute editing of my "escritos" for Spanish class. I am content to stay here until it is all done, and then it will officially be Christmas Break! Estoy muy muy emocionada para celebrar esta noche el fin del semestre!

This is what Christmas break is like........

Elena: "My stomach just made a video game sound!"

Tricia: "Hmm have you been eating batteries again?"


Hard to describe the sound.... but it's similar to the shooting sounds in this video, once you enter the arcade. ;)

The Snuggie

Okay, so I'm doing a little research on getting a Snuggie (Judge me, I don't care.) and I came across this forum discussing the Snuggie. And I HAD to share:


Liz11685-
@alltheteainchina: "Yeah, I wish my Slanket were a few inches longer. But then I would probably trip while walking to the microwave to heat up lazytimes food."

Newsgirl-
"I'm still trying to fight the urge to buy a Snuggie. I want one really bad, though... but I have this fear of my family busting in my living room and seeing me wearing a red one covered in popcorn and Junior Mints."

musicpup-
@Leslie: "My family expects no less of me."

Majrhoulihan
"I would keep that in my cubicle, and wear it without shame."



Favorite part? The crowd of Snuggie-wearers cheering on at a sporting event. Awesome. :)

Highs

I feel like a different person than just two weeks ago. God is crazy!

Random delights throughout the day:

1. Having a somewhat bad attitude for having to work at the museum all day, and then being pleasantly surprised by a group of jolly old men singing Barbershop Christmas songs right in the gallery. :)

2. Journaling more thoughts today than in the last few months of my life

3. My co-worker Angela telling me she wanted to come to Sunday school and church tomorrow with me after talking with her about it on Friday night.

4. My boss Jan telling me she wanted to give me a Christmas present this year, and she had me pick out a piece of jewelry that one of the vendors was selling today at the museum. It's really beautiful! I almost cried when she told me that.

5. Hanging out with Teri and Tricia tonight for LOSTathon! Aaaaand eating Chinese food. It's been too long!

6. The Lord giving me soooo much joy and hope in Him!

Beautiful surrender

Today I've been absorbed with this prayer: You can have all of my life.

I'm so open to whatever He wants me to do or wherever He wants me to be. There is complete freedom in fully serving Christ. I am so in love with Him, I can't believe I ever chose something or someone over Him!

I'm learning to trust Him everyday. Not with just what I want or what I want HIM to do, but I'm trusting Him to be all that I need, that He truly is enough for me. I'm not quite there, but I want to be. I've been learning soooo much about who He is, and I love it. I want to be fully satisfied with just Him.

I'm on the altar, I've given Him my most precious thing. I don't ask for Him to give it back, I'm just ready to serve where He wants, I'm ready to obey Him in every situation.